Magic 8 Baby

Having conversations with a two-year old is like asking questions to a Magic8 Ball.

"Odessa, should I have pizza for lunch?"
"No way."

She's adopted in her two years a level of confidence that I in my 22 years have yet to find. Every response is said with enthusiasm, she is always positive her answer is correct.

"Odessa, what color is this banana?"
"RED!"

Her accuracy is about as good as the Magic8 Ball's. After watching too much Barney on TV, I attempt conversation.

"Hey squirt, do you remember that guy ... ?"
"No."
"His name was..."
"No." She has no time for my foolish conversation. She already told me no.
"Well, ok. Anyway, should I do something about that situation?"
"Yea."
"Should I tell him I still like him?"
"Oh no. YUCKY."

At this point she was pointing to some fuzz on the couch that she found appalling, but her response said it all. Liking boys was yucky. Her "oh Nooo" was enough to do me in. At this point, she put her purse on her shoulder and was walking into the other room.

"Bye." She turned to me and waved. Thinking harder, she came over to me and looked up and said forcefully, "KISS."

I gave her a kiss and she walked away. I think I need to be taking some more pointers from her. Boys are quite positively yucky, but if you have enough confidence and a little force, you will rule the world.